Having a child can bring you some of the greatest joys, days of laughter, a life of happiness, and a great sense of purpose. It can also bring with it nights of worries, days of frustration and years of heartache. This is also true of the emotions you can feel if you choose not to have a child. It is a decision that will affect you for your entire life.

The decision of course is your own, whether or not to have children, but why then do so many people think they need to give their input as well?

If you are married, or in a relationship, this is a decision that of course will have to be worked out together, but your long-term partner is the only person who should have equal say. Well meaning parents might be asking and pressuring you to give them grandchildren, and telling them that you have decided not to have children can be hard. You should never have children because someone else wants you to. If people are pressuring you, or asking you about when you are having children, don't feel like you have to justify your reasons, just tell them that you decided not to, or if it's easier, just tell them that you are still thinking about it, and leave it at that. Do not let anyone tell you that you are being selfish by deciding to not have children; it is your decision and right to make that choice.

Without children, yet still nurturing

Some women have never thought that they wouldn't be mothers when they grew up. They always pictured themselves with husbands, homes and the pitter-patter of little feet. As we all know, what we picture as a child does not always happen when we grow up. Life happens, we get into our careers, our relationships, and our lives, and some of us decide that having children just isn't for us. Most women are nurturing by nature, and whether that means taking care of our children, our job, or something else, we can still feel fulfilled. If you choose not to have children, there is nothing wrong with that. Leave raising children to those who want to, and be confident that you made the right decision for you.

by Rachel Goodchild

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