Dream a little
Weddings work really well when they have a theme, and chances are you already have a few ideas of what your dream wedding looks like, as will your partner. Grab a pen and paper each and nut out what your ultimate wedding looks like, feels like, what sort of venue it is - all the ideas you can think of. When you have finished, compare notes and talk about what you want to aim for. You might not be able to afford to get married in Paris, but you could certainly create a Parisian feel with the right music, food and venue.

Budgets, budgets, budgets
Now that you have had your fun to dream, it's time for the boring part. The FINANCES. The reality is, most weddings cost a lot of money - the average wedding in New Zealand totals in at around $30,000. Regardless of whether you want to do something cheap and chic or seriously splurge, you will need to know upfront what you and your partner can each put towards the wedding, how much others may contribute, and how much you are prepared to spend on your big day.

Do your homework
A lot of venues, particularly overseas ones (beach weddings) offer a package deal that includes a wedding photographer, flowers, celebrant and honeymoon accommodation. If this is what you are after, this can be a stress-free way to organise a wedding, but be sure to research what you are getting for your money. Likewise, if you are organising all of your vendors yourself - photographer, flowers etc, then be sure to put in some research time to make sure that you will be happy with the quality and the cost.

Do even more homework
Once you decide on a venue, photographer and florist, make sure that you and they fully understand what you have agreed on, and get it in writing. That way you are protected should anything go wrong, you reduce your chances of red flowers when you actually wanted pink, and you won't get any nasty bills or additional costs at the end of the day.

Get creative
Don't be afraid to break with tradition - if you don't want to wear white, don't... if you want to invite all of your guests to dress up in a costume, ask them to dress up! It's really up to you what you do, and personalised weddings are also often the most fun. I recently attended a wedding ceremony in a forest. The ceremony was held beneath ancient native trees which had crystals twinkling from the branches. It was completely unique to that special couple, so don't be afraid to let your personality shine through and wow your guests with something that breaks with tradition.

Communicate
Make sure your guests and family members are kept really well informed of all the proceedings. People like to be prepared with the right outfit, they often need to book accommodation, and they may well need a map and local taxi numbers. Prepared guests are happy guests. If your invite needs to be accompanied by a brochure, so be it.

The venue rules
Make sure that you are aware of what time the event is to end at the venue, and what time the guests have to leave the location. You will incur extra fees at most venues for staff overtime if you overstay your welcome. If necessary, have an MC announce another location to move on to and to help clear the room. Make sure that you know what time the venue staff will begin cleaning up - it is never fun trying to do your wedding dance while someone mops between your toes!

Chase things up
A few weeks prior to the wedding follow all vendors up in writing with the agreement and what is expected of them. Mistakes can happen, and this is one day where you will not want any missing caterers or absent DJs.

Diarise the day
Last minute stress will be eased for you, and your team if everyone knows what is expected of them and when. Remember the bridal party are there to help you, but you don't want to have to be barking orders or stressing about who has forgotten what in-between getting your hair and makeup done. Put together a timetable of the day, including instructions on what each person's responsibility is and when they need to have it done by.

If all of the above looks frightfully daunting to you, you may wish to investigate the costs of a wedding co-ordinator and consider it an investment in your sanity. Remember the more organised you are in advance, the more you can relax and have fun on your wonderful wedding day.

Article by Je t'aime Hayr

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