Get everything out in the open

It's not as simple as turning up, reading from a piece of paper - you will need to make sure that your celebrant is happy with you reading out your own vows, and you also need to decide whether you will write your vows on your own or together with your partner. If you write them separately will you show them first? When everybody is aware of the plan you can start to set the wheels in motion.

Decide on a structure

Think of it like this - any speech, or any writing has a structure - a beginning, middle and an end, and this is how you should plan your words. So for the first part, you might speak specifically about what it is that you love about your partner, for the middle share why you work as a couple, and for the final part you could say what you promise to your partner and in your future together.

Remember:

Set your tone

Do you want your words to be amusing and sincere, or passionate and romantic? What is the sort of tone that comes naturally to you, and what does your partner inspire in you? If you keep to your natural voice and honest emotions the words will come more easily.

Don't be superfluous

Try to remember that you have an audience patiently listening to you and you don't want people falling asleep in the pews. It is best to keep the words short and sweet.

Need inspiration to get started?

Ask yourself the questions below and see if the answers help you to put together your speech.

Was it love at first sight?

When did you know that your partner was 'the one'?

How have you changed for the better since meeting your partner?

How do you see your shared future together?

Have you shared an emotional experience that has brought you closer?

What are your shared goals, dreams and inspirations?

How would you describe your love? Calm, exciting, grounding, deep?

How would you describe your thoughts on marriage - why is it important to you?

What are you looking forward to after marrying your partner?

What qualities will you and your partner each bring to the marriage and how will this ensure lasting love?

When you answer the questions, keep the answers short, simple and clear. Key points as to what makes your love unique and lasting will make the vows touching and sincere.

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