1.    Be confident about your body
As tricky as it is, especially when you’re having a fat day, don’t let your insecurities overshadow the passion.  Because as hard as it is to believe, your man isn’t scanning your body for flaws the second you take off your clothes. In fact, all he is thinking about once you get naked, is how aroused he is! And what turns him on even more, is if you wear your nudity with confidence. So embrace the skin you’re in, convince yourself that he DOES find you attractive (because he DOES) and enjoy the fun of angst-free sex. 

2.    If you don’t ask, you won’t get
Still find it a little embarrassing to use ‘the words’?  But not getting quite the stimulation you are after? Then you need to learn the art of subtle dirty talk. Here’s an example of what not to do: “I want you to put your [insert body part] into my [insert body part].” Unless you are very brave, this is bound to make you turn all shades of red. Instead try guiding his [body part] to where you like it, move it in the way you like it to be moved and encourage him to keep doing it by saying: “I love the way this feels”.

3.    Yes, you can give him a hand
Touching yourself, to complement the efforts he is making, is not only normal, it’s a massive turn-on for him. Only around 25%-30% of women are able to orgasm via penetration so it makes sense that you help things along with some manual stimulation.  Because in the end – he wants you to orgasm as much as you do. So while it might be nice for your man to help you get there, if you don’t make it to orgasm through his efforts, we strongly recommend you take matters into your own hands.

4.    Kegels are key
Practicing your Kegel exercises before and during sex, is the best thing you can do for both you and your partner. Strengthening your pubococcygeal (PC) muscles by squeezing and un-squeezing them daily will help you have more control during sex. How do you know you are doing it right? Try and stop the flow of pee next time you go the bathroom and you’ve found the right muscles.  And doing the same exercises, whist your partner is inside you, will intensify both your orgasms.  You can help these exercises along by using smart balls.

5.    Don’t go too soft, or he will too.
When it comes to their penises, men prefer a firmer (but not strangling) grip and more assertive movement over delicate strokes and gentle fondling. In fact, if you’ve been together more than 6 weeks, you’ve probably seen him pleasuring himself and noticed how much pressure he applies, especially as he approaches climax. So simply ask him, if your pressure is enough, or get him to put his hand over yours as you stimulate him so he’s still somewhat in control. 

Take Care,
Sarah at sexgear.co.nz

 

Sexgear.co.nz is a playful and fresh adult toy and lingerie website. It’s where Kiwis shop for a little harmless adult fun – 24/7!
www.sexgear.co.nz

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