Question:
Hi Vaughan,
When a guy tells you he is not ‘ready’ for a relationship, do you think that means he’s just afraid of commitment, or he isn’t interested full stop?
Amy

Answer:
Hi Amy

Is "He's Just Not That Into You" at the DVD store under a $1 for a week yet?

If so rent that, if not, go to the library, borrow the book.  Read that book/Watch that movie, then IGNORE EVERYTHING IT TOLD YOU, THAT BOOK/MOVIE IS NOTHING BUT COMPLETE EVIL WRITTEN BY SOMEONE WHO WILL NEVER FIND TRUE HAPPINESS! 

That book has done no relationship any good at any stage, it makes content women look for problems in their relationship, it makes women who are in a casual relationship want to get married, it makes angry bitter women more angry and more bitter.

If you need to read a book to be told that you're not happy in your relationship you're already in a bad way.  If you want to read a book to base your relationship on, how about the childhood classic "Everybody Poops" I've never read such to the point non-fiction that applies to everyone.
 
Also think of it this way, the saying "I'm not ready for a relationship" is a term with hugely different meaning when said by the different genders. 

When a guy says it, it's assumed it's because he doesn't want to tie himself to one girl when a better girl might come along & he doesn't want to be tied up if that opportunity presents itself. 

When a girl says it it's assumed it's because she likes being a free spirit, having no serious ties at her age, she's concentrating on her career or she's getting to know herself. 

When really she just might not want to tie herself to one guy when a better guy might come along & she doesn't want to be tied up if that opportunity presents itself. 

Maybe he just isn't ready for a relationship, and if you want a relationship with him, not just a relationship with someone, then hang in there, he'll either become ready or break it off. If you want a relationship with just someone then go and find someone else who wants to jump headfirst into a "relationship" with someone they don't fully know.

They're out there and they are waiting, probably surrounded by stuffed animals, photos of their mum ooooooor posters he's cut out of FHM....
 
This has all been a little too serious... and to be honest, I've been giving you the run around... There is a very simple test to see if he wants to be a relationship with you and if it's going to work... 

In a pot boil 5 cups of water, add a pinch of salt, some hot sauce, a tablespoon of cornflour, one ripe strawberry, a teaspoon of mint, 2 pinches of turmeric, 1/2 a cup of apple cider vinegar & 1/2 teaspoon of nutella, bring to the boil.... Add a strand of your hair and a strand of his hair (acquiring this while he is sleeping is the best idea) put them both in the pot, if it turns green, it's meant to be, if it turns orange, it's a condemned relationship, find someone else to start a relationship. 

I learnt this from my Grandmother, she was a Wiccan High Priestess, so please don't tell anyone about this or she'll turn me into an unfashionable house plant, like a Yucca.

No one likes them anymore; they are always put outside and end up dying.

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